My heart thumps in my bony chest. I hit again.
I listen. The lock pops open. Found locked away in a corner of the basement, the glossy images ignite in her an unrelenting desire for attention and adoration. Now, reflections on her past as a stripper permeate her thoughts as she takes on the new roles of mother, caregiver and wife. While helping her baby daughter take her first steps, she nurses her mother through the final stages of breast cancer.
Spiraling through memories and torn between the woman she is becoming and the woman she has been, Sheila Hageman is continually Stripping Down. The province of womanhood and daughterhood, wellness and illness, concealment and exposure are examined with an intensity and honesty that's truly rare. A necessary and important book. Hageman's story is told without pretense or excuse, allowing for a vulnerability and honesty rarely seen, resulting in her most courageous act of all-an emotional stripping.
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This is not a romanticized tale of easy redemption—e. I have included a variety of photos to design the cover with—I am not wedded to any one idea for the cover. Something similar to the original that uses one of the nude images, but with nothing explicit showing. Only one thread of the book is about me as a stripper. The book is also about mothers and daughters. I could see the use of a photo of my mom as working. Or me and my daughter, or my mom and me, or just me as a child.
Once you read the overview of the book below, I think you will understand the feel of the book better.
I believed that naked women had the power to take my father away from me. I eventually became that which I thought my father loved—an adult entertainer. Years later, in face of the crisis of being a new mother while caring for my own mother, who was battling breast cancer, I strip down and cast off the inessentials of being. I revisit my topless past to discover and make sense of my relationship to my body and to challenge the meanings and definitions I created for myself. I strip down to what really matters—health, time, and family. Even still, my persistent desires, which feel necessary, but selfish: my beauty, my body, being the perfect mother—trigger an exploration of female identity and body image, and a reexamination of how my childhood of hiding away resulted in an adulthood of overexposure.
A conflicted modern woman is revealed, both victimized by the male gaze and succumbed to the oppressive culture in her anxious search for attention, her saddening competition for praise. I embark on a journey through grief to understand the connections between my body, my beauty, and my self. My story does not connect in straight lines because my female life does not fit into a neat, clear-cut narrative form; it spins, rotates, and spirals in upon itself.
Stripping Down reflects this cycling between reality and fantasy, motherhood and childhood, and sexuality and love. A spiral through time and memory is reflected in the structure of the story, and as I resettle in the present day, I cannot help but question the validity of my own life.
I search for answers to what it means to be a woman, torn between an unrelenting urge for fame, adoration, and specialness with a looming feeling of unavoidable responsibility and seriousness. I flashback between my sex-work tale, my childhood, and my life as a mother to examine how I came to sexuality, and what may have created an insatiable quest for beauty, attention, and love. I explore my transformation from child, to young woman, to stripper and nude model, to mother, as I grapple with why I do not love and accept my female body and self—when so many others have.
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I explore how my impulse toward identity as an external image affects who I am, and how my entire life, spent fixated on my body image, must be reevaluated. My sense of power as a stripper is juxtaposed with the powerlessness of dealing with my mother, which impels me to understand my life differently and to recover what I have given away of myself.
Feelings of longing for my mother fuel the search for who I was as I attempt to understand the meanings the world and I created. My persona in the first-half of the memoir is detached emotionally as a way to handle my spiritual crisis, but there is a slow unfolding of emotional trusting, pulling the reader into my process of understanding and acceptance.
In the first section, I explore my relationship to my female body, specifically in how I became a stripper and nude model at I sort through the chaos as I chronologically delve into the end of my stripping career and the parallel descent of who I became. I accept the choices I made in the past; I accept the self I was struggling to discover and create.
Stripping Down is a memoir for women that will help them to further value their own identities through my quest to understand what it is to have a female self. For women interested in developing their own life narratives, I explore how writing our lives and discovering our selves is all part of an ongoing process. I connect the dots between the bonds of body, beauty, and self with which all modern women struggle. Stripping Down recreates the experience of chaos and then shows the slow unfolding of order to share the truth with other women, so that they, too, may be able to look at their present and past selves for answers to questions of identity.
My story illuminates the possibilities for positive change in women, no matter what their pasts hold. Readers will witness the consequences of actions and beliefs and how the past can be reframed and the future rewritten. Interest in the adult entertainment business, feminism, and inspirational stories promises an audience for Stripping Down because of the unique combination of all these approaches, which presents tremendous mass-market potential.
Young women, from high school girls to women in their twenties, will relate to my relationship and body image struggles. Statistically, young girls are more afraid of becoming fat than they are of nuclear war, cancer, or losing their parents, and 2 out of 5 would trade years of life to achieve their weight goals. Stripping Down will show them the risks of trying to live a life to please others and the dangers of focusing on the fleeting rewards of thinness and beauty.
In the United States there are approximately These women will find an honest account of the first year of motherhood from a middle-class working perspective. Mothers dealing with the realities of work, caring for an ill or aging parent and a child, and holding together a marriage will find hope and solace as I struggle through the same issues.
Women who enjoy self-help and inspirational stories will profit from the self-help techniques I explore throughout my journey in Stripping Down. There is an abundance of readers wanting to change their own lives who will benefit from experiencing how I surmounted my past challenges.
Stripping Down will be a wake-up call that they can come back from trauma in their lives. Yoga enthusiasts will discover the behind-the-scenes making of a yoga practitioner and teacher. Also, writers and teachers of creative nonfiction will find a great deal to explore about the creative writing process as it unfolds in the narrative.
Women dealing with breast cancer, which is the most common cancer among American women, will find an illness narrative dealing with the effects of breast cancer on mothers and daughters. The chance for women of developing invasive breast cancer is about 1 in 8, and there are currently 2. The theme of my ongoing struggle with depression will ensure readers; women are twice as likely to experience depression than men.
There are approximately 7 million women in the United States clinically depressed. Stripping Down will encourage them that they are not alone and that treatment is an ongoing and many-faceted journey. I was a Teaching Fellow Fall and Spring You can illuminate the body from various angles to create a focal point, cast shadows or camouflage certain areas.
It's also easier to touch up a well lit photo with image editing software ref. Other pictures bring Greek myths to mind. Elves, Amazons, inhabitants of lost and forgotten places This inspiring and masterful collection of art photographs takes readers on a journey to the hidden heart of eroticism , e.
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